Three things happened after my debut on Broadway:
- I cried because I had been 1 minute over my time limit.
- Jesus told me I would become famous.
- Judah Friedlander fist bumped me.
It all happened so fast.
“Marina? Linda. Follow me.” And that was my introduction to the New Talent Agent Linda Smith at Caroline’s Comedy Club. “Keep your arms at your side we’re going to head in through the kitchen.” She yelled over her shoulder as she disappeared behind two green doors.
Everything happened pretty quickly: 9:07 p.m. I was asked if I needed to sit down (apparently the blood had drained from my face). 9:25 p.m. I was mid-hyperventilation when they called my name. 9:26 p.m. Time to Shine.
Next thing I knew a small flashing red light came into focus. It flashes when you go over time – a big taboo of amateur comedians. I stopped mid-joke and half sprinted off the stage. My career was over. I was so flustered, I neglected to wish luck to the girl after me. All I was focused on was slinking into the back room to contemplate my demise as a comedian.
Ten minutes later the girl burst into the room. Unlike me, they had shut off her mic when she had gone over. She was not happy about it.
“These Mother Fuckers. Shutting off my mic. I’ll show them.”
I tried to comfort her, “It’s okay. I went over too.”
She quickly stood up and put her hand in the air. “You know what? I don’t give a fuck about these fucking assholes* shutting of my mic, shutting off your mic. I know I am funny and you know who else knows? Jesus. Jesus knows I am funny and he is going to make me famous and he’ll make you famous.” She quickly gathered her things and stormed out of the room.
Before I could react, Judah Friedlander walked in and dropped off his backpack. He looked at me and gave me a head nod then reached out his fist, “Whut up.” I stared at his fist for a second and then touched mine to it. ”Cool.” He said and walked out.
Lesson 4: There is always someone who will mess up more than you – don’t worry, Jesus has your back and if not Jesus, then an overweight actor that kinda looks like him will.
* Language preserved to keep authenticity.